A note.
A note to me.
A note to me from my body;
and it doesn't say 'Dear'
instead greets me with fear
and throws me in a mess
emotional, and in distress
can't forget and can't obsess.
A note.
A note to me.
A note to me from my body;
but it's all written in code,
yet I think I'm owed
a hint of what it's getting at,
clueless and bereft, I'm sat
blindly hoping, but can't deal with that.
Because I want to know -
I don't want to guess -
chances are I'll stumble my way through
the next few weeks and you
won't let me know the truth
until I've done what you didn't want me to do.
So in English, please,
my native tongue,
don't leave the words unsaid or run-
ing, crashing, into one another,
spilling from your mouth to gutter,
I'm still none-the-wiser, still I wonder...
so help me out, alright, would ya?
A letter.
A letter to me.
A letter to me from my body;
you didn't sign it off,
just left it in the air and dropped,
the ball on me, shaking, thundering
rain clouds leave me juggling
all the plates, my fingers fumbling.
And if I'm honest, I think that I know your meaning,
but if there's nothing I can do to stop this feeling,
then maybe I'm always going to be reading
your note
but it don't float
'cause I'm me
it's no joke
you must know this by now
after all,
nearly thirty years we've been together, you know.
So a note.
A note from me.
A note from me to my body;
I know you haven't the foggiest what's going on right now,
'how could I treat you like this, how?'
But I didn't know what pain I was going to put you through
just with a few changes; a simple house move,
a change of location, a new job situation,
and if I'd known - it wouldn't change what I'd do.
So a letter, a memo, a 'please, could you though?'
to you;
we will get through-
you don't need to make me so aware
that this is stress-causing, 'cause I get that, yeah?
We've done this before,
and we'll do this again,
it's a different rhythm
and a different kitchen
but the same dances I do
to the same 80s tunes
that I've always listened
to
so adjust,
and trust,
that it's a process, but get there you must.
And you will.
A note.
A note to me.
A note to me from my body.
So I'm writing back:
thank you for drawing my attention
to you, I know you rarely get a mention,
but it's okay. I don't know what I'm doing either,
but let's muddle our way through this together.
